Skewered: Sex is overrated - leeks too

When I read this, I initially thought it was a belated April Fool's joke - and a state of war: "Zurich is planting vegetables on traffic islands." However, the matter is quite serious. To save money, the city of Zurich is planning to grow vegetables instead of flowers on public green spaces such as traffic islands or at streetcar stops from 2014. So if you get on or off the tram, your eyes will soon be treated to leeks and fennel instead of stepmothers and columbines. Gone are the days of eating the hated kebab on the streetcar, now carrots are being nibbled everywhere. And what was no longer in stock at Coop pronto can now be picked at the streetcar station.

Everyone benefits and the city can save up to 10,000 francs a year. Lukas Handschin, spokesman for Grün Stadt Zürich, confirms that the vegetable islands are no joke. The concept is rooted in the SP's call for an "edible city". According to well-informed sources, the Grossmünster is soon to be baked out of gingerbread as part of this concept. As a kind of crispy house for the Christmas season. If everyone eats them, it will also be a sign of ecumenism in action. But joking aside. Because the local council has already waved the minestrone through and next year Zurich is getting serious. Cabbage stalks, beetroot and parsley everywhere. And leeks too.

Pigs at Central

After a week of thinking about it, I am still torn as to whether I find "urban farming" imaginative, funny or embarrassing. Of course, all families would be delighted if the concept were implemented consistently. That would mean placing small cages with bunnies and pigs on the islands. And a horse here and there. And perhaps Alex Rübel would also contribute a few flying foxes from his Masoala hall. As a kind of symbol for the Greater Zurich Area, as people think internationally here. Only then would the whole thing be complete. So, as you can see, I'm leaning towards the "embarrassing" rating.

But if the Zurich vegetable invasion were now a guerrilla advertising campaign, for example for the Zurich Farmers' Association, Coop's horsemeat-free organic vegetables, Tibits or Zurich's Engrosmarkt - that would of course be a blast. Perhaps one or two advertising agencies will manage to come up with the idea for an adventurous client by 2014 and create a campaign that will be remembered for years to come: "Oh, they were the ones with the vegetables all over town ..." Vegetarian branding would be something new.

Pollutants in cabbage and turnips

However, there are some concerns. Green city councillor Ruth Genner warns against growing vegetables on urban borders. This is because the traffic islands are often next to roads (oh my!), which makes the vegetables inedible due to the high level of pollution. Moreover, it should be borne in mind: Undetected genetically modified maize could affect public transport users and car drivers, which would again drive up health costs. That's why I prefer to rely on the assessment of my favorite a cappella band "basta" from Germany: "Sex is overrated - leeks too." (www.youtube.com/watch?v=UbkSgsk40mo) And keep one thing above all else away from vegetables.