Goethe was not a copywriter!
The latest edition of the Duden dictionary includes 5,000 new words. From “Vollpfosten” to “Vorstandsfrau,” there’s quite a lot to be found. But none of this helps combat the deterioration of the language. By Karl Lüond, freelance journalist.
With words one can argue excellently, with words one can prepare a system, with words one can believe excellently, not an iota can be robbed from a word." Friend Mephisto is speaking in Faust I, verses 1995 ff., and it is well known that he was a devilishly good connoisseur of human nature.
Fox, deer and wild boar, live in peace! In future, I will mainly hunt words, buzzwords and empty phrases. My current favorite game is the "partner".
"Your real partner for the finest specialties" was written on the truck blocking my view of the traffic lights. Above it was the logo of a company known for cheap convenience food. Conversely, shouldn't the company Bianchi, for example, which distributes exquisite fresh fish, be a "fake partner"? What makes a partner "genuine" anyway? It has to be the horrible factory sauce together with the ready-made vegetables that are served to the "partner" guest as a dish of the day using a microwave for 15 Stutz in all the restaurants that can't do any better.
In the meantime, I'm being referred to as a "partner" everywhere. Rail Event claims to be my "partner for rail experiences" and IBSK is "the partner for glass scratch removal". Hundreds of partners for printed matter and complete IT solutions are buzzing around the web, as are "partners for used and new cars". I come across "partners for commercial real estate", asset management and garden design, for cash registers, chainsaws, professional construction drying, but also for outpatient anesthesia.
Which probably wouldn't be a bad idea at all to protect against the ubiquitous dumbing down of terms. After all, what does "partner" actually mean - apart from the personal and intimate sphere? The term describes an equal partner, someone who - another fashionable term, certainly, but appropriate here - is "on an equal footing" with me, strives for a common goal and, if successful, shares the spoils with me. Laurel & Hardy were partners, or Dick & Doof, Tintin, Adam & Eve, but no insurance agents or car salesmen, please.
What do my "partners" for insurance, chainsaws and glass scratch removal really want? They want to create an artificial closeness where, at best, a business relationship is up for discussion. In reality, they all just want what's best for me, and that's at the back right. But they cheekily lay claim to exclusivity: from now on, I'm your partner and no one else's; don't you dare do it with anyone else...!
When I buy a chainsaw, I definitely don't need a partner, I need goods for money, thank you, goodbye, warranty case reserved! Even when I buy a car or have something printed, I don't want to enter into a long-term commitment - I only do that when I have built up trust after months and years of a good customer relationship and voluntarily come back for more. Take this lovely travel agency, for example, which put together a wonderful trip to Sicily for me last year and didn't bat an eyelid, but only charged me a ridiculous handling fee when the whole thing had to be postponed for months.
In its hackneyedness, "your partner" is a perfect example of how terms have been trashed in the name of ubiquitous marketing. And you know what? I suspect anyone who uses such slangy terms is also dealing in inferior goods. Anyone who tries to "take me in" with the colleague or partner scam instead of convincing quality and service is suspect.
The use of language betrays inner states. Mephisto says it like it is: "For just where the terms are lacking, a word (or a word with a punch) appears at the right time." Goethe was definitely not a copywriter. Rather, if anything, "your partner for the elegant use of language".
Fox, deer and wild boar, live in peace! In future, I will mainly hunt words, buzzwords and empty phrases. My current favorite game is the "partner".
"Your real partner for the finest specialties" was written on the truck blocking my view of the traffic lights. Above it was the logo of a company known for cheap convenience food. Conversely, shouldn't the company Bianchi, for example, which distributes exquisite fresh fish, be a "fake partner"? What makes a partner "genuine" anyway? It has to be the horrible factory sauce together with the ready-made vegetables that are served to the "partner" guest as a dish of the day using a microwave for 15 Stutz in all the restaurants that can't do any better.
In the meantime, I'm being referred to as a "partner" everywhere. Rail Event claims to be my "partner for rail experiences" and IBSK is "the partner for glass scratch removal". Hundreds of partners for printed matter and complete IT solutions are buzzing around the web, as are "partners for used and new cars". I come across "partners for commercial real estate", asset management and garden design, for cash registers, chainsaws, professional construction drying, but also for outpatient anesthesia.
Which probably wouldn't be a bad idea at all to protect against the ubiquitous dumbing down of terms. After all, what does "partner" actually mean - apart from the personal and intimate sphere? The term describes an equal partner, someone who - another fashionable term, certainly, but appropriate here - is "on an equal footing" with me, strives for a common goal and, if successful, shares the spoils with me. Laurel & Hardy were partners, or Dick & Doof, Tintin, Adam & Eve, but no insurance agents or car salesmen, please.
What do my "partners" for insurance, chainsaws and glass scratch removal really want? They want to create an artificial closeness where, at best, a business relationship is up for discussion. In reality, they all just want what's best for me, and that's at the back right. But they cheekily lay claim to exclusivity: from now on, I'm your partner and no one else's; don't you dare do it with anyone else...!
When I buy a chainsaw, I definitely don't need a partner, I need goods for money, thank you, goodbye, warranty case reserved! Even when I buy a car or have something printed, I don't want to enter into a long-term commitment - I only do that when I have built up trust after months and years of a good customer relationship and voluntarily come back for more. Take this lovely travel agency, for example, which put together a wonderful trip to Sicily for me last year and didn't bat an eyelid, but only charged me a ridiculous handling fee when the whole thing had to be postponed for months.
In its hackneyedness, "your partner" is a perfect example of how terms have been trashed in the name of ubiquitous marketing. And you know what? I suspect anyone who uses such slangy terms is also dealing in inferior goods. Anyone who tries to "take me in" with the colleague or partner scam instead of convincing quality and service is suspect.
The use of language betrays inner states. Mephisto says it like it is: "For just where the terms are lacking, a word (or a word with a punch) appears at the right time." Goethe was definitely not a copywriter. Rather, if anything, "your partner for the elegant use of language".
